Voice Dialogue

voice dialogue

  • Life balance and increased life choices
  • Compassionate connection to all parts of yourself
  • Expanded grounded awareness
  • Improved communication


What is Voice Dialogue?

Voice Dialogue was developed by Jungian influenced psychoanalysts Hal and Sidra Stone.
It is a practical, alive counseling process that allows us to ‘separate from’ and hence not be ruled by parts of ourselves or ways of thinking, that seem to automatically ‘run the show’ of our lives.
Voice Dialogue provides awareness of the various patterns that create 'disharmony' and fosters the development of a compassionate awareness for these patterns.

Voice Dialogue also explores ways of being that we would like to have more present in our lives.

The process provides the platform for enduring change and stronger connection to your innate, peaceful state of being.


voice dialogueWhat is the process of Voice Dialogue?

In Voice Dialogue the facilitator assists us to identify a particular 'voice', 'part' or 'identity' that seems to be strongly influencing the way we are thinking or feeling .  In a full session, we are invited to enter that part and really get to feel and understand  how and why it operates.  The facilitator asks specific questions to guide this process until integrated insight occurs.  Many of these ways of being (e.g the ‘pusher’), have helped us get to where we wanted to go.  However if they are automatic ,and we don’t seem to be able to ‘turn them off’, e.g. when we want to relax, or be receptive in relationship, we or those around us can experience great frustration.  


Particularly troublesome are what we call ‘the gang’.  These are the parts that can give us a hard time e.g. ‘the critic, the judge and the pusher’.  Gaining an understanding of their modus operandi is very helpful in voice therapy and in living a more joyful life with choice. 
Integral to the process of Voice Dialogue is the development of awareness, where we can witness or observe different forces or voices within us and take the best of what they have to offer. 


How does Voice Dialogue work? voice dialogue
Living a balanced life, is much easier when we are aware of the parts that switch on automatically, so that we are not compelled by the ways they think, feel or act.  Most people are amazed at the effectiveness of the process and how after having ‘interviewed’ a particular part, its power is diminished, and there is recognition and awareness when it tries to kick back in.  As we develop our 'awareness muscle' we 'get to the bottom' of the feelings and vulnerabilities that trigger these ways of operating and separate us from our 'real self'.

In Voice Dialogue we also develop access to under-developed or under-utlised ways of being, to bring more of what we want into our lives. Some of us say to ourselves, ‘I wish I could be more like ….. ' (some person who we admire for the qualities they embody). For example, 'this person seems carefree or relaxed or not worried about what others think' . And then we may say , ‘but that’s just not me’ or ‘I’m just not like that”.  We may feel resigned to being stuck with ourselves the way we are, when in fact, what we have experienced as ‘me’ is simply ways of being that were learnt to deal with life.  As children we did the best we could to survive or thrive and the development of what are called 'primary selves' occurred to 'protect us.  As we develop an integrated awareness of these parts, and 'taste their specific flavours' we unravel patterns in the psyche and lasting change occurs.



More effective communication
We can communicate more effectively when we are aware of, and can take care of the feelings beneath the automatic voices. Many of us feel dissatisfied with our communication, particularly with certain people or in certain situations.  We may feel conflicting parts of ourselves as we try to communicate, for example, a part that takes care of our boundaries and wants to ‘stand up for us’ and another part that is be very concerned about speaking out, rocking the boat or upsetting others. In Voice Dialogue, we use processes to find balance in our communication, so that we can be very clear and considerate of others at the same time.  We don't generally realise what can be triggered unconsciously in others, when we are communicating from 'parts' rather than our true selves.  so we can be surprised and frustrated when our best attempts to communicate are met with defensiveness.   Whatever the issues may be, using Voice Dialogue processes, we can balance various parts of ourselves, and communicate in a way that feels better to us and is well received by others.


How can Voice Dialogue assist in Voice Therapy? voice dialogue
The use of Voice Dialogue alongside traditional voice therapy methods can assist in bringing awareness to habitual psychological and corresponding physical patterns that are impacting on voice production. Voice Dialogue can unhitch us from ways of being that restrict the freedom of the breath, or involve excess muscular tension in the tongue, jaw or throat.   Parts of ourselves/ways of being that commonly impact negatively on the voice are many, but include; perfectionism, self criticism, being always ‘on', not standing ones ground, needing to always please everyone or over-giving to others whilst neglecting yourself.  Loosening the grip of these ways of operating, gives tremendous freedom and often unravels habitual patterns of tension associated with producing voice.  Freedom from these unhelpful or over-developed ways of being/speaking, and more access to the underdeveloped qualities, often makes implementation of vocal techniques into everyday life, so much easier.  In getting in touch with the under-developed  or 'disowned parts'  we commonly explore more relaxed and self-connected ways of being (that often don't 'get a look in' because other parts 'run the show'). We can then experience that both life and voice production can be much easier and pleasurable.


Voice Dialogue & Self-Enquiry

The awareness that occurs when we witness different voices within us, can be a platform for realising that we are not who we thought we were.  When we see clearly where the conglomeration of often conflicting thoughts, feelings and beliefs come from, we can experience that underneath these is a deep state of peace, our 'soul' or essence.  Accessing this pure state, which can be experienced as peace, joy or simply 'awareness', is a huge relief for most people.  Many of us experience this state apparently 'randomly' and often wish we could come back to it, but don't know how.  The understanding that this beautiful state is our innate condition that existed at our birth, prior to our 'conditioning'  is a key to accessing ongoing peace .  For some people Voice Dialogue can be the first time that they experience themselves as separate from the internalised voices and hence experience their inherent state of peace. The process of unravelling from the limited patterns we have developed,  becomes so much easier as we strengthen our ability to rest in our 'true selves' where awareness abounds.  Those familiar with the practice and philosophy of 'Self-Enquiry' will recognise the similarities of identifying the often troublesome 'ego' or 'identity' in operation and the process of resting in a known or felt sense of presence and awareness that is the 'true self.  From this unshakeable sense of peace there often flows insight and deep understanding and compassion for others.  We may call this 'groundedness of being', and there are several processes used in Transpersonal Voice Dialogue to explore and anchor this further.